Venting

seriously skip if you want!

well I haven't posted for over a month. I know i suck at this stuff at times but i just feel like crap!!!

I promise to post about the BIG thing that have happened this last month

Steven parents came

Kenzie blessing

Lunch and birthday parties

Mary Kay

Kenzie turned 7 months

But for now I may just rant for a while. I don't know what it is but I just feel yucky. down in the dumps and have no desire to get out of it. I just wana lay in bed and sleep. just wanna check out for a while. I didn't go to church on Sunday I just couldn't handle it. I even canceled my VT appointment witch was dumb because I LOVE those girls and I know it would have been nice to see them. I went to work but felt like i totally failed at my job because I seemed so disconnected. I wish I could just feel fine and not have DAYSSSSSSSSSSSSS like these. I made myself a Dr. apt with Dr.D and that should be good She is such a good family doctor really understand all of me physically and emotionally.

I spent my night up with Kenzie I dont understand why she was waking up every hour on the hour all night.... I sure love that girl, Mommy work is hard stuff. I love HER so much and would do anything for her I just feel like such loser when I get like this. Like she isn't getting what she deserve even when i give my best. I feel my best just never seem good enough. I think i feelt that way my whole life. Like I am always paying catch up. I am just ready for winter to be over and leave and maybe the sun can shine a little hard on me to help me get out of this rut.

Hope your day is going better than mine

Love

Lisa